Like Oxygen
by theoneyouforgot
Summary: After Edward leaves Bella is indeed broken into a thousand pieces, as a way of making herself whole again she throws away all of her morals one by one and living a life that she should be ashamed of.


**Here it is, while it is not descriptive it is suggestive so please proceed with caution. **

It had been three months since Edward left. It seemed that the only thing that could make me feel alive again was him; he was like cocaine, or oxygen. Everything thing I did reminded me of him, and that made the pain all the worse. I hated myself for falling for him, why me, this was not like me? I was not that girl that fell in love, but apparently I was that girl. I was the girl that wasted all of her time worrying about someone that did not love her in return.

I got of the truck and slammed the door heading into the music filled house. Charlie decided that nothing would be better for me than to go to a party. I begged and begged for him to spare me but nothing. I was forced to go, and if that was not bad enough Charlie, being as smart as he is, decided to drive me to make sure I would actually go to the party and stay there. I had no intention of staying more than just to see one or two people that would tell Charlie that I was actually there, and then I was bailing.

The loud music gave me a headache, that and the strong scent of beer and cigarettes. With a pounding headache I searched for one person I knew that would tell Charlie I was at the party. Just one person, damn it where was everyone when you needed them?

After what had been much longer than I wanted I saw Mike, Mike Newton, a worthless slop but still he would do. I walked up to him. He was obviously drunk but I was not surprised by that he seemed the type, beer bell and all.

Between drunken laughs he managed to say something along the lines of, "Bella I surprised you're here, glad but surprised. Hey wanna drink, you need a drink." Though I could not completely understand him between the loud music, my growing headache and his drunkenness, it may have actually been, "Hey ya, couldn't that be a dear. I want to ring, or you want a ring," though it seemed that the fact that he shoved a mysterious looking liquid in front of me made it seem more likely to be the first.

I took a sip out of the cup, wow it was strong. But it felt good, that is the best way to describe it, it felt good, free. Mike Newton leaned over to me again. "This is my cousin Pedro."

"Nice to meet you," I screamed over the music. I took another sip, then a gulp. The more I drank made the party make sense, over course you would have the music louder so that people would talk louder therefore exercising their vocal chords. Mike's cousin just nodded. He obviously had more of the fantasy drink than I.

"Okay well I am getting more to drink, you want some Bella, you are running on empty." I had not noticed it before but I drank the entire cup. I gave him my cup. He left leaving me with this Pedro. My head did not hurt so bad anymore, the alcohol made it feel better.

Pedro looked up at me, "You're hott."

I am not sure if I blushed then or at the next moment but either way I blushed. I found myself flirting back with this guy that I barely knew. It felt good to flirt; it made me feel alive, as strange as it seems this man comforted me. It was almost if I could see Edward standing in the corner glowing with envy, even though he was not here it felt good to hurt him even if it was only in my mind.

Mike came back to give me my drink then wandered away again. Apparently I did not appeal to Mike when he was drunk, how ironic.

The night sped past, it seemed within thirty minutes I had more drinks than I ever had in my life, which is not saying much, either way I was on the highway to being completely wasted. I found myself in Pedro's lap, not really talking just laughing. It was the kind of laugher where you are not laughing at anything particular but laughing because you do not know what to say. It was pitiful and disgusting but it was where I lied, between love and hate.

After another thirty or so minutes Pedro looked at me, "Let's go upstairs." I was not an idiot; I knew exactly what he was asking of me. I agreed, for some odd reason I did, I was not attracted to this guy but I agreed. As he led me upstairs I once again felt

Edward scowling at me in the corner, and when I kissed Pedro it was not the stranger that I felt on the other side, it was Edward.

**Okay now don't get me wrong, Charlie is not a bad father he just wants Bella to socialize. Please review, I am excited about the next chapter! **

**-theoneyouforgot-**


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